A Land Far Away

Conversations between a Dutch- and a Ger-man, Part I

<Ger-man> Hello, fellow -man. Did you die of boar bite yet?
<Dutchman> I'm immortal. Invincible!
<Ger-man> Oh. Okay. And here I thought a crit of that boar could have rended you in twain.
<Dutchman> Boars do 1d6+2?
<Ger-man> It bit me for 9 damage. So think again.
<Dutchman> 1d6+3 then. I really doubt they do 1d8. I'll check a real wiki. The NWN2 wiki.
<Ger-man> Yes, that will have information about what our builders put in as damage for boars. No doubt.
<Dutchman> Oh ye -man of little faith. 1d8+5, btw. So a lucky crit is 26 points of damage. I'll be 4th level by the time I won't die of that.
<Ger-man> Safe from insta morguing at level 3.
<Dutchman> From the local indigenous fauna, at least. Unless they're bears.
<Ger-man> I'm sorry, did I mention I deal far less damage than a boar?
<Dutchman> You need to do some weights' training.
<Ger-man> You think low strength hurts in a PW where you gain money by slaughtering mobs and hauling stuff? Hm, you might be on to something there. I guess I'll just use my charisma and diplomacy to make them pay more for each completed hauling static.
<Dutchman> You are forgetting those stats are not supposed to have an in-game effect.
<Ger-man> How could I forget.
<Dutchman> Steel > diplomacy. Just be glad you're not a pickpocket.

Parts censored to protect the young.

Conversations between a Dutch- and a Ger-man, Part II

<Dutchman> My fellow -man, I suggest our characters take a swim by the river.
<Ger-man> You realise that bathing together, by the laws of fantasy gaming, has to lead to consummate lovemaking.
<Dutchman> Not if we go by U.S. rules. Then all we'd get are gratuitious, but unrevealing flesh shots.
<Ger-man> However, we are both Europeans. Which means that nipple sucking is just the equivalent of a handshake. A casual hello.
<Dutchman> That is what I like about the U.S. It makes you realise there is such a thing as Europe.
<Ger-man> It is in both our hearts that the Eurovision hymn plays, fellow -man. Te deum!