Bloody Jewels

[Mikayla]

The following is a writing sample I sent to WotC 17 weeks ago. The goals of the writing sample were pretty simple: Provide an explanation for certain inconsistencies in the WotSQ book Condemnation and tell an entertaining story. So far, I have not heard from WotC. We shall see.....

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Bloody Jewels.


In a dim chamber just beneath the twisting, chaotic pathways of Menzoberranzan, the lash of a whip sailed through a long, graceful arc and then snapped against black skin, drawing blood and eliciting an anguished scream. Neither the crack of the whip nor the cries of its victim were unusual sounds in Menzoberranzan. Indeed, many might say such cruel noises are the very music of that dark city. However, in this chamber, the whip was wielded by a male; a robust, muscled drow of middle years whose inherent cruelty was all too visible in the malevolent glow of his eyes. The victim was a female, slender, with long snowy white hair that cascaded over her indigo-black shoulders. She was tall, but at the moment, she was bent over a squat stone pillar, once gray, now stained dark with the blood of countless unfortunate women before her.

In the matriarchal society of the Lolthian drow, such a scene was virtually incomprehensible. There are exceptions, however, and the lower chambers of the tavern known as “The Jewel Box” are an exceptional place. In those dark chambers, a male drow could, for a great deal of coin, use and abuse a female drow in whatever way he liked, provided that all permanent injury was paid for.

The robust male brought the whip back slowly and studied the graceful curve of his victim’s back. She was beautiful, even by the standards of the drow. A smile eased its way onto his dark face, and he walked slowly around her bound and bleeding form.

“Not so proud now eh Ghilanna?” He asked. “Or should I say ‘Matron Tlabbar’?” The chained female turned her head sharply at his words, trying to get a look at her tormentor. “Yes, I know who you are, or, well, who you used to be,” he continued. “Once you were Matron of House Faen Tlabbar, third House of our fair city. You took that title upon the death of your mother, Ghenni’tiroth, and the deaths of your sisters Fini’they and Ghenni’salla.” The male stepped in front of Ghilanna, grabbed a handful of her silken hair, and jerked her head back to stare into her face. “Look at me when I talk to you! For too long I had to look at my feet when in your presence. Do you recognize me? I was one of your captains.” He glared at her for a moment, and she returned his gaze with nothing but cold resignation.

“Yes, you were matron once. You even managed to stay matron after that Symryvvin witch Hesken-P’aj brought your sister Ghenni’salla back to the realm of the living.” He chuckled coldly as he readied the whip in his hands. “But even you could not stay Matron when Lolth saw fit to release your mother’s soul from the Demon Web. How disappointing a Matron did you have to be for the Spider Queen to let your mother return to the living? And what did dear mother do once back?” He smiled as he toyed with the long, black lash. “She sold you to Nym here at the Jewel Box. Just for me I think.”

“You are an insect,” Ghilanna spat. “Lolth watches, even here, and this transgression will not go unpunished you stupid male.”

The man laughed in reply. “Trying to goad me into killing you? Save you from further humiliations? I think not dear Ghilanna. I intend to come here often and for a long time. Just as you reigned for 13 years as Matron of Faen Tlabbar, so too do I intend to reign as your master for 13 years. Then I will consider mercifully killing you. Maybe. But that is a long time from now.”

A deep, darkly seductive male voice answered the Tlabbar captain before Ghilanna could.

“You are not going to live that long.”

The Tlabbar captain turned his gaze to the voice coming out of the dark. An extraordinarily tall male rushed out of the gloom, a blade in each hand. The Tlabbar captain did not hesitate; he flicked his wrist and the whip shot forward, its tip slashing at the newcomer’s face. The tall man’s skin did not break like Ghilanna’s, however, and he did not stop. Instead the newcomer thrust a black-bladed rapier into the side of the captain who fell back under the attack. The wounded captain quickly dropped his whip and groped for his sword’s hilt. Pulling his blade free from the captain’s side, the newcomer slashed at his opponent’s wrist. The tall man then shifted his weight forward onto his left foot and drove the black stiletto wielded in his off-hand deep into the captain’s chest.

Ghilanna, still bound to the stone block, could hear agonized screams as the doomed captain was repeatedly stabbed. The desperate yelling ended, followed by a dull thump and a few moments of gurgling. Something grabbed her leg. Ghilanna looked down to see the bloody hand of the Tlabbar captain gripping her calf. The hand gave her leg a few desperate squeezes and then relaxed, falling to the floor motionless. Silence followed.

“Who are you?” She asked the victor.

“Hello Ghilanna,” the voice answered. “I must admit that in all the years I’ve known you I’ve pictured this scene more than once but never thought I might actually see it.” The new male’s voice resonated too deeply and too smoothly for a common drow. It was otherworldly.

“I know that voice. You are Eliazar the incubus. My mother let you off your leash today? Come for some fun? Fool, Lolth will have your soul, if an incubus such as yourself even has one.”

Eliazar laughed just slightly. “Such bitterness Ghilanna. I was your patron too, once. Nice to see you have not changed though. Ever the faithful of Lolth? Ever the noble princess? Even when chained and whipped? ”

“Why are you here?” Ghilanna asked through clenched teeth.

“Matron Ghenni’tiroth, your mother, is dead. Again.”

“How? Explain male,” Ghilanna growled.

“Still giving orders?” Eliazar chuckled. “Good for you. Well, in short, she was assassinated. Again.” He sighed, his escaping breath sounding like the hiss of a snake. “This time it was not Matron Kyorl but a shadow-using assassin. Your sister Sil’zet was also killed.”

“So Ghenni’salla now rules Faen Tlabbar? Are you here to finish matters for her?”

“No, your twin sister Ghenni’salla is actually away in Mantol Derith trying to rebuild our trade concerns following the collapse of the main cavern there. The cave-in probably has something to do with the death of that harlot Yyssisiryl H’tithet. Some relative of hers, Harammamyl I think, replaced her. The survivors, ours, the duergar, the gnomes and the surfacers, all moved into the serpentine lower passages. Ghenni’salla is seeing to our interests after the disaster. Of course, as our fair city is now under siege, Ghenni’salla and her entourage are cut off from their return. Assuming they are even still alive of course.”

“Under siege? What are you talking about?”

“Oh yes, quite. It seems the duergar of Gracklstugh have decided to take advantage of Lolth’s silence and sack our city.”

Ghilanna spat in disgust but she knew the threat the duergar posed was very real. Gracklstugh, the City of Blades, was very strong. Without Lolth’s aid, Menzoberranzan would be hard pressed to resist a full scale war.

“Have they attacked yet?”

“In a manner of speaking,” Eliazar replied. “The Matrons, not you of course, came together and decided to send an army out to ambush the oncoming duergar. They met the gray dwarves at the Pillars of Woe. Unfortunately House Agrach Dyrr had other ideas. They betrayed us. The Army of the Black Spider, as it was called, was routed. Qu’ellar Agrach Dyrr is now under siege within our city while our city is besieged by the duergar.” Eliazar paused. “There is another wrinkle as well. The Scourged Legion of Kaanyr Vhok has allied with the duergar.”

For a moment Ghilanna lay still across the stone absorbing Eliazar’s tale. She closed her eyes and let out a long sigh. In her mind’s eye she could see the destruction of her house and possibly even the entire city. In her two and half centuries, she had never known a more dangerous time.

“So who is leading our house?” Ghilanna asked.

“Your sister Vadalma has taken the throne.” Eliazar watched for her reaction.

“What? Vadalma? She is too young. She is too stupid! Where is Mod’Venis? ”

Predictable enough, Eliazar thought. “Mod’Venis was at the academy naturally and unable to muster forces sufficient to unseat Vadalma. Mod’Venis still lives but is confined to Arach-Tinilith. I do agree with you about Vadalma though; if left to rule, she will be the end of Faen Tlabbar.”

Now Ghilanna understood. “So you are here to set me free? I am your choice to replace Vadalma?”

Eliazar smiled. “Of course.” Well, perhaps anyway, Eliazar thought to himself.

“Set me free then.”

“Ah yes, well, there are promises I would like you to make.”

Ghilanna rolled her eyes and nodded. “Naturally, but I will make none.”

Eliazar blinked in surprise. “What?”

“Ask what you will of me when I have retaken Qu’ellar Faen Tlabbar, and if I like, I will grant it. If not, I will deny you. All I will promise is that I will not forget this moment. But that is all I will promise. Now set me free demon.”

Eliazar blinked again, a smile forming on his dark lips. “You mortals can be so intriguing. Very well.” The handsome fiend stepped forward and began incanting a spell to release Ghilanna from her bonds. A moment later, Eliazar stopped chanting, and Ghilanna’s shackles fell to the ground. She stood, her slender, bloody back arching as she straightened up and stretched out her arms.

“Finally,” she said. Ghilanna turned to look upon Eliazar. He had taken his usual drow appearance – black skin, silver hair, beautiful face, slender body. His unnatural height was the only visible clue to his abyssal origin. Without taking her eyes off the demon, she bent down over the dead Tlabbar captain at her feet. She nimbly unbuckled the baldric from which the dead man’s long sword hung and slid it over her naked shoulder.

“Now Priestess,” Eliazar spoke, “we have the problem of actually taking the House.” Eliazar looked the naked woman over appraisingly. The demon could see that none of the fire, none of the malevolence or wicked intelligence had left the former Matron. Perhaps this was a wise move, he thought.

“I assume you have a plan?” Ghilanna asked.

Eliazar raised his eyebrows and smiled boyishly. “Well, actually no. Not really.” He shrugged and raised his hands. “I am not much of a general.”

“Rothe dung,” Ghilanna replied flatly. “I do have a plan. For months now I have had nothing to do but think, and from what you have told me, we can take the House right through the front gate.”

“How is that priestess? You have been exiled to this … place. The guards will not let you in.”

“They will if they think I am Ghenni’salla.” Ghilanna bent down again over the Tlabbar captain and removed the Faen Tlabbar House Symbol from around his neck. “I shall enter as my twin sister. We will catch Vadalma quite off guard. Once on the throne, I will be Matron, and that will prove I have returned to favor.”

“One flaw priestess. Well two actually. Ghenni’salla never travels without her bodyguard and you cannot defeat Vadalma’s own guards alone. You need an army or at least a band of warriors, and you have none.”

Eliazar paced about the room slowly. If Ghilanna could not come up with a reasonable plan, he would carry out his original order from Vadalma; he would kill Ghilanna. This little interlude had been simply to satisfy his curiosity. Was Ghilanna really that much more capable than Vadalma? Eliazar needed to know. If not, Ghilanna would die here in this chamber. Eliazar’s fate had become inexorably intertwined with that of House Faen Tlabbar centuries ago and he would see that the best priestess possible ascended to the throne.

In the gloom, Ghilanna now smiled wickedly. “But I do have an army Eliazar,” she said slowly, “an army of elite females in fact.” Eliazar cocked his head for a moment and narrowed his red eyes. Ghilanna walked toward the door of the chamber, and the Incubus’ hand strayed to the hilt of his poisoned throwing knife but he hesitated. Curiosity was getting the better of him.

Ghilanna pushed open the heavy chamber door and stepped into the faerie-fire lit hall beyond. To her left and right were similar doors, each leading to another dark chamber in the Jewel Box’s basement of horrors. Without a word, Ghilanna crossed the hall to the nearest door and opened it. Inside the chamber, a naked male straddled a naked female lying on a bed. The female’s limbs had been shackled to the metal bed posts, and she was helpless to defend herself as the male threw a punch into the side of her face. The man was so intent on beating the female that he never heard Ghilanna walk in and retrieve the man’s own short sword from where he had left it sitting with his clothes.
With the naked man’s sheathed blade in her left hand and the unsheathed long sword of the Tlabbar captain in her right, Ghilanna padded up to the bed silently. Slowly she put the long sword to the naked man’s neck. He froze in mid-punch as he felt the razor sharp edge of an adamantine blade at his throat.

“Eliazar, release her bonds,” Ghilanna commanded. The incubus entered the room and performed his lock-breaking incantation again. The prostrate female’s shackles fell from her limbs. Ghilanna led the man off of the woman at sword point, keeping the tip just under his chin. The female rolled off the bed away from Ghilanna, the male and the incubus. Ghilanna spared her a quick look. The girl was fit and quite pretty, although the left side of her face was a bloody mess from where the man had been punching it. Her left eye was a ruin.

“Here,” Ghilanna said, tossing the long sword onto the bed by the girl with one hand and thrusting the short sword into the hands of the naked male with her other. Wide-eyed, the man franticly looked from Ghilanna to the wounded female, who armed herself with the long sword.

Suddenly the game became clear to the naked man. He fell into a defensive crouch and simultaneously drew his weapon. Desperately the man eyed the now unarmed Ghilanna and the doorway beyond, but Eliazar caught the man’s look and simply shook his head. Ghilanna stepped back to watch, and Eliazar slipped beside her.

“The girl is wounded,” Eliazar whispered, “she might get killed, and then you have no recruit for your army.”

“If she cannot fight, I do not want her,” Ghilanna replied.

The female stepped up onto the bed and came at the male cautiously. The male, crouching low, back pedaled away from the girl and the bed to deny her the height advantage. He grinned slightly as the girl stepped off the bed and kept coming. Still back pedaling, the naked man began to sidestep to the girl’s left.

Eliazar saw the logic and whispered to Ghilanna. “He’s figured out she’s blind in her left eye.” Ghilanna simply nodded.

The girl advanced and leveled her sword at the naked male who continued sidestepping. As the man gained the naked girl’s blind left side, he burst into action, stepping forward and stabbing at the female with the short sword from low to high. The girl spun to her right, away from the male’s attack not towards it. As she did, she flipped the long sword into an overhand stabbing grip. The male was committed, and his thrust missed the spinning girl. She finished her half-turn and blindly but accurately thrust the long sword behind her. The deadly black blade caught the man just under the ribcage and pierced one of his lungs. His eyes went wide, and his mouth opened as if to scream. The girl jerked the blade free of his body and spun back to her left, opening up the distance by an arms length. As she came around to face the wounded man, she brought the long blade up high and slashed down on the diagonal from right to left. The man’s head left his shoulders and rolled to Ghilanna’s feet, his eyes and mouth still open.

Ghilanna looked to Eliazar and smiled slightly. “She’ll do.”

Ghilanna looked back to the female and addressed her. “What is your name girl?”

The female hesitated then answered. “Shereiza Auvryndar.”

“Auvryndar? Of Ched Nasad? You’re a long way from home. Of course I did hear about Ched’s fall, so I suppose you have no real home now. I am Ghilanna Tlabbar. You will follow me.”

The girl flipped bloodstained strands of hair from the left side of her wounded face. “Why should I follow you? I have the sword now.”

“And I have the demon,” Ghilanna answered. With that, Eliazar manifested his wings, unfurling them behind him like some unholy cape.
“Then my sword is yours,” Shereiza said, bowing her head slightly.
Smiling, Ghilanna turned and walked out into the hall. “Here is my army Eliazar, behind the chamber doors of the Jewel Box. Indeed, it is as if Lolth placed them here just for this moment. They are houseless now, exiled, out of favor and forgotten. They will follow me, fight for me, and die for me, or I will let them rot here. Better to die than serve as the plaything of a male.”

Eliazar nodded. “Speaking of the males, what of them? There are others here. And what of Nym and his staff upstairs?”

Ghilanna whirled on her heels to face Eliazar, her pale green eyes burning with a cold fire. Suddenly Eliazar saw the depth of her faith, her hatred and her malicious, uncompromising will.

“Death,” she said. “Death to them all. Death to any who would violate the Way of Lolth. Shereiza and I shall free the rest of my followers and see to the death of the males down here. You will see that no one upstairs escapes to tell the tale and ruin our little surprise. This cycle shall be the last for the Jewel Box, the last for that heretic Nym, and the last for many a blasphemer. Lolth shall be avenged. We shall be avenged.” Ghilanna closed her eyes and bowed her head. “For Lolth.”
“For Lolth,” echoed Eliazar.

For Lolth indeed, he thought. It was a shame that the goddess was likely dead and unable to see this performance. It would amuse her no doubt.

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An hour later, Ghilanna stood in front of a dozen beautiful, blood drenched females outside the abattoir that had been the Jewel Box. Ghilanna had made each woman fight and kill her tormentor or one of Nym’s staff. Ghilanna would have no untested warrior or priestess by her side. Some had failed. These twelve had succeeded. Though bought by Nym for their beauty, to a woman they were killers. They equipped themselves with blades and mail taken from their victims and cloaked themselves in the dead men’s piwafis.

Using the drow sign language, Ghilanna ordered Shereiza to form the women into a diamond-shaped perimeter around her and Eliazar. Shereiza obeyed, and silently the women took their positions. With another silent signal Ghilanna ordered the advance. Shereiza walked at the point of the diamond, the ruined left side of her face covered by a makeshift bandage torn from the sheets of her now empty bed.

As she walked, Shereiza silently prayed to Lolth and contemplated her situation. A month ago, Matron Shyntlara Auvryndar, having survived the fall of Ched Nasad, had sent her daughter Shereiza to scout Menzoberranzan. Shereiza had promptly been captured and sold to the Jewel Box. Thanks to Lolth and Ghilanna, Shereiza now had the opportunity to infiltrate a major Menzoberranzan house. Through Shereiza, Matron Shyntlara could manipulate Faen Tlabbar, and eventually even take the house altogether. The Auvryndar would rise from the ashes of Ched Nasad like their own undead slaves, and perhaps, just perhaps, Matron Shyntlara would bestow her dark gift upon the daughter who made it all possible.

In the center of the diamond formation, Eliazar signed to Ghilanna. I almost pity Vadalma. I believe her forthcoming death will come as quite a shock to her.

I do not plan to kill her, Ghilanna replied silently.

“What?” Eliazar asked aloud. Shaking his head he returned to sign language. You cannot depose her and let her live.

I can and I will, Ghilanna answered. Our house has an unknown enemy, an enemy with powerful assassins capable of striking down our own matron. I have no intention of being this assassin’s next victim. Though I will take the Tlabbar Throne, Vadalma will go on appearing to be our Matron to the outside world, at least until we deal with this new threat.

Ghilanna turned to look the incubus in the eye. “Lolth has shown us the way. A year ago, she allowed my mother to return so that when the assassin came it would be her that was killed not I. Though once deposed, I am not dead. Though once enslaved, I am now free. Lolth may not be answering our prayers, but she is not silent – her will is clear. Deception is the key to our defense when force of arms and magic cannot protect us. I will not ignore our Dark Mother and kill Vadalma just for the pleasure of it. Besides, our house will have need of all of its priestesses before this is over I think. Indeed, perhaps we can even see to bringing back Sil’zet. More than one priestess has journeyed to the Demon Web only to return later.”

Eliazar nodded. Provided they actually survived the next few hours, Ghilanna was living up to his hopes. Well then he signed, we just have the simple matter of taking the third most powerful house in Menzoberranzan away from its sitting Matron Mother. Fortunately, we have a dozen harlots to help us. Victory is practically assured.

Ghilanna ignored the sarcasm. “By Narbondel’s next ebb, I will either sit on Faen Tlabbar’s throne or kneel before Lolth’s. Either way, I will be better off than I was.”

But will I? Eliazar asked himself.

[Mikayla]

Geez people, almost a week and not one comment. Is this story that bad?

[Trazk]

I just finished book 2 and then read this and it does help ! I like it ! Fills in a few things nicely

JS

[Zakharra]

This story renders me speechless......for a time. But WOTC should hire you as an author or else...

[Magonushi]

Well when she does get hired, I hope Mik finds Vel'meth's works blessed enough by Lolth to include in some form or another.