Despair
Posted: Wed Apr 13, 2005 6:48 pm
The frigid air cuts deep into my flesh as I step out into the night. Habit brings the words to my lips that repel the cold…so long now has this land been frozen. I pull the door closed behind me shutting out talk of the war to come. I will hear no more plans for fortifying these cities while the land lay open, undefended.
Looking down upon the village, I am struck with doubt…the same questions that have plagued my mind for many months…Why am I here when my duty lies elsewhere? Is it as I have been assured…that defending these accursed cities is the only way to save the land?
Slowly I make my way through the freshly fallen snow to the riverbank, its waters free of ice…the only thing in this land that is so. My gaze sweeps across to the trees…barren and lifeless. Despair…I feel it all around…crushing me beneath its weight…the land weeps for the sun. With a ragged sigh, I move on to the bridge. My steps falter...so tired. I cannot remember when last I felt so weak, so helpless.
A nod to the guard and the gate is opened without question. Carefully, I continue on into the darkness but a misstep on the icy planks sends one foot sliding…my other leg, so weary, gives way. I fall to one knee, squeezing my eyes closed...breathing deeply as pain sears up my thigh. Should I be comforted that I can still feel such? Footsteps rushing toward me…the guard.
“Lady Ahleera! Are you well?” The genuine concern in his voice pulls at me but I remain so numb and cold…frozen to my core just as is the land.
“My lady?”…more anxious this time.
I reply in a harsh whisper barely audible above the wind, “Leave me.”
Hesitating only a moment, he moves back to the gate. Gathering my remaining strength…or is it my will?...I rise shakily, and move into the Vale, a shadow among shadows.
Looking down upon the village, I am struck with doubt…the same questions that have plagued my mind for many months…Why am I here when my duty lies elsewhere? Is it as I have been assured…that defending these accursed cities is the only way to save the land?
Slowly I make my way through the freshly fallen snow to the riverbank, its waters free of ice…the only thing in this land that is so. My gaze sweeps across to the trees…barren and lifeless. Despair…I feel it all around…crushing me beneath its weight…the land weeps for the sun. With a ragged sigh, I move on to the bridge. My steps falter...so tired. I cannot remember when last I felt so weak, so helpless.
A nod to the guard and the gate is opened without question. Carefully, I continue on into the darkness but a misstep on the icy planks sends one foot sliding…my other leg, so weary, gives way. I fall to one knee, squeezing my eyes closed...breathing deeply as pain sears up my thigh. Should I be comforted that I can still feel such? Footsteps rushing toward me…the guard.
“Lady Ahleera! Are you well?” The genuine concern in his voice pulls at me but I remain so numb and cold…frozen to my core just as is the land.
“My lady?”…more anxious this time.
I reply in a harsh whisper barely audible above the wind, “Leave me.”
Hesitating only a moment, he moves back to the gate. Gathering my remaining strength…or is it my will?...I rise shakily, and move into the Vale, a shadow among shadows.