Library Challenge - March "War"

[oldgrayrogue]

"Blood."
Eyes close, back to the rough cut trench wall.
"No, no, mud. More mud than blood."
A hoarse laugh. "Smoke. Can't see shyte for all the bloody smoke."
The horns sound.
"Up! Up and to death! Up to ruin!"
The war cries mix with the death cries.
Eyes open squinting, stinging.
One foot slips atop the slick trench wall.
"Gods I'm so tired."
YEARRRGH!!!!

[Ithildur]

((a recent page from Aglaril's journal))

Wars have casualties. None but the very young, most naive or the very foolish would be unaware of this.

It is however, one thing to give mental assent to such notion, another thing entirely to know it's heart wrenching truth firsthand.

To have it become personal, and strike close to home...

Coming to terms with loss, with grief, was something I ran and hid from. The bottle, the jokes, playing the fool, hollow laughter and empty smirk, all served me well enough or so I thought. So I told myself, for a very long time, though I could not fool all of them.

I am glad now, that I have been weaning myself of such.

Though Taernl's death did make me pause and wrestle, consider going back to playing the happy fool, consider the old comforts, like a merchant slowly appraising some bauble before returning it back to it's display.

How much more then, now with this tragic loss! Three lights snuffed out, like stars on an overcast night! Brightly they would have shone, each in their own way, with many more days to shine even brighter still.

I tremble to think what I would have done, what I would have turned to, were I still the same elf. Else I might have become the saddest casualty of them all, a casualty of war though not from bodily wounds.

I fear that others around me may yet become such casualties, in body and mind... casualties of this war.

I seek a warrior's training, for times such as this, for times of war. For war never truly ends in this life.

But it does not mean that one has to like the fact.