After scanning everything including the Jump Drive to find them clean, I pulled the drive and later the next day gave it to my son to get some files. He was immediately smacked with the same infections. We both have had to do low level hard drive wipes and complete system rebuilds. Since I had set this machine up to work on ALFA, it is interfering with me in a number of ways.

We have established that the firmware is the source of death. It looks like these things are coming out of the factory with this mess installed.
Watch out for these things!