ALFA is my Facebook

[boombrakh]

You know how people, when they have a minute to spare, check their Facebook on their phone? Well, these forums are my Facebook.

Whenever I get a minute to spare, I login to the forums, hoping to take part of something interesting. But sadly, it is lacking in something interesting to delve into.

[kid]

Start posting videos of cats riding vacuum cleaners.

[Zelknolf]

Though more seriously, our PR efforts have been seriously lacking talent for a year-ish now; things are less interesting because there aren't as many people because nobody's excited to play because either they don't have reason to be or don't know that there's reason to be.

[CloudDancing]

*whistles*

Alfa was my facebook, then facebook was my facebook.

Now Fetlife is my Facebook and tabletop gaming is my Alfa.

[kid]

*Checks out Fetlife*
*Giggles*
You go girl.

[Heero]

I admit I Googled it too, but Im too conservative to actually click the link upon seeing the Google description in the search.

[kid]

Went one step after you.

Clicked on the link but then clicked at nothing on the site.

[Zelknolf]

I would just like to note how rapidly this conversation turned from a cat in an adorable costume on a roomba to bondage sex.

Go Internet!

[Veilan]

I am somewhat amazed that the cat actually sat still on the cleaner, even when it bumped against the wall. Has it been trained in the circus, by a cohort of relentless Russians, or at least people with an east European accent?

[Rumple C]

Nothing so conspiratorial. The simplest answer is the correct one.

Super glue.

[Zelknolf]

I am somewhat amazed that the cat actually sat still on the cleaner, even when it bumped against the wall. Has it been trained in the circus, by a cohort of relentless Russians, or at least people with an east European accent?

Probably Germans. Or Austrians.


In any case, if you listen closely, you can hear "sits auf dem Vakuum!" being shouted angrily in the background at the start.

And now I prepare to be scolded for my terrible German

[causk]

Sitting on a vacuum is quite impressive. But for proper german it would have to be: sitzing auf dem sucker(of dust).
Im not sure if the board-for-defining-proper-german has come up with a name for roomba yet. Itll probably be "self-propell-automated-navigating-kontraption".

[gonz.0]

Nothing so conspiratorial. The simplest answer is the correct one.

Super glue.

Was thinking that myself.

[Veilan]

Im not sure if the board-for-defining-proper-german has come up with a name for roomba yet. Itll probably be "self-propell-automated-navigating-kontraption".

The wife and I call it Schnufflosaugus.

[Zelknolf]

I dunno. It's hard to imagine someone sounding furious while commanding a nearly-untrainable animal to sit on the Schnufflosaugus.

Unless the tyranny is precisely insisting that the cat and all things it interacts with be both adorable and adorably-named. And that brings the story together, of a cat broken by its demanding owner who trains it primarily to appear adorable on social media so they may say to strangers what a joy the animal is-- but the animal is dead inside, having attempted simply ceasing to eat until death's dusky creep drags it to final peace, but being thwarted by base instincts every time. And so it is here, being filmed with glassy gaze on something ahead; it doesn't matter what. Whatever it is will be gone in time, like all things. It sits not because it wishes; it sits because it can't find the motivation to do anything else anymore.




(actually that last bit is probably true regardless. Because cats.)